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The best jokes and joke writers!

Check Him Out

The old man had died. A wonderful funeral was in progress and the country preacher talked at length of the good traits of the deceased, what an honest man he was, and what a loving husband and kind father he was. Finally, the widow leaned over and whispered to one of her children, "Go up there and take a look in the coffin and see if that's your pa."

Coma Time

Dr: "Mr Smith, your wife is comfortable."

Husband: "I thought she was in a coma and critical condition."

Dr: "She is, the nurses are using her as a beanbag."

Boy & Grandpa

A little boy comes running Into the room and says, "Grandpa! Grandpa! Can you make a sound like a frog?" The Grandpa says, "I don't know, why?"

The little boy says, "Because grandma says as soon as you croak, we can go to Disneyland!"

The Big Jump

Q: OK, there's a smart blonde, a brunette, and Santa Claus on top of the Empire State Building. If they all jump off at the same time, who will hit the ground first?

A: The brunette, because the other two don't exist!

Graveyard Hair Salon

Q: What was the name of the hair salon next to the graveyard?

A: "Curl Up and Dye."