Dark Humor Jokes

If you love to laugh at the jokes that shock and disgust most people, then you have found your Graceland! ROFL with these deplorable wise cracks about death, incest, domestic violence and more!

Black Widow Spiders

Q: Why do female black widow spiders kill the male after mating?
A: To stop the snoring before it starts.

Categories: Dark Humor Jokes (Death Jokes) , Animal Jokes (Insect Jokes) , Riddles , Relationship Jokes (Woman Criticizes Man)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Air Trouble

"This is Captain Sinclair speaking. On behalf of my crew I'd like to welcome you aboard British Airways flight 602 from New York to London. We're currently flying at an altitude of 35,000 feet midway across the Atlantic. If you look out of the windows on the starboard side of the aircraft, you will observe that both the starboard engines are on fire. If you look out of the windows on the port side, you will observe that the port engines have fallen off. If you look down towards the Atlantic ocean, you will see a little yellow life raft with three people in it waving at you. That's me your captain, the co-pilot, and our flight attendant. This is a recorded message. Have a good flight!"

Categories: Airplane Jokes (Crash Jokes) , Dark Humor Jokes (Death Jokes) , Profession Jokes (Pilot Jokes) , Travel Jokes (Plane Trip Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Shell Game

Two little boys are in a garden playing with their pet tortoises. The first little boy says that his tortoise is the fastest , so they have a race – the first to reach the garden wall wins. The second little boy sets his tortoise lumbering off toward the wall, but the first does nothing. The second little boy says, “You’re going to lose that bet.” “No I’m not,” replies the first little boy, who picks up his tortoise and chucks it at the wall.

Categories: Funny Thoughts , Dark Humor Jokes (Death Jokes) , Animal Jokes
Anonymous