A Folk Remedy

A man's wife had been in a coma for several days following a particularly nasty knock on the head. As usual, one of the nurses in the hospital was giving her a wash in bed. As she washed down the woman's body, she sponged her pubic hair. Out of the corner of her eye she thought she had seen the woman's eyebrows shudder. Not quite sure, she tried again. This time, she actually did see some movement. "Doctor, Doctor," she called, "I saw some movement!" The Doctor came in to the room and tried as well. Once more, they both saw movement around the woman's eyes. "Well this is good news," said the Doctor. "I think we should call her husband and let him know." Anyway, they called her husband and told him that they had seen some movement. When he arrived, they explained that by touching her pubic hair, they were seeing some sort of reaction in her facial muscles. The Doctor suggested that the husband may like to try something a little more adventurous in order to provoke a stronger reaction. "I suggest that we leave the room and that you try a little oral sex," he said. The husband duly agreed and so he was left alone in the room. Several moments later, all the emergency alarms and buzzers were activated. The Doctor and a host of nurses ran in to the wife's room where they saw the husband zipping up his jeans. "Oops," he said, "I think I choked her."

Leachman to Bob Saget

Cloris Leachman on Bob Saget:
"You didn't just kill sitcoms. You raped them and left them for dead, just like I did to Gavin MacLeod in 1975."

Addicted to Internet Porn

          Signs Your Partner is Addicted to Internet Porn

1. During foreplay, he's always double-clicking your G-spot.
2. His new computer includes a tissue dispenser.
3. When she wants you to take off your pants, she says, "Scroll down."
4. Tells everyone he's a pioneer in "palm computing."
5. He's suing Playboy.com for repetitive stress injuries.
6. Her favorite actor? Tommy Lee.
7. When he sees a hot babe, he wryly says, "Boy, I'd like to click on her."
8. You look deep into his eyes and see a faint image of Asia Carrera burned into his corneas.
9. As you undress, he takes out his credit card and tells you his birthday.
10. During sex, he shouts, "Refresh! Refresh!"
11. His version of foreplay: You lie naked on the bed with a sheet covering you... he pulls it down slowly for ten minutes.