Profession Jokes

Lawyer's Grave

A woman and her little girl were visiting the grave of the little girl's grandmother. On their way through the cemetery back to the car, the little girl asked, "Mommy, do they ever bury two people in the same grave?"
"Of course not, dear." replied the mother, "Why would you think that?"
"The tombstone back there said, 'Here lies a lawyer and an honest man.'"

Categories: Profession Jokes (Lawyer Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Shark Week - Day Job

Q: What do sharks do the other 51 weeks of the year?
A: They go back to their jobs as lawyers.

Categories: Pop Culture / Celebrity Jokes (Shark Week) , Profession Jokes (Lawyer Jokes) , Animal Jokes (Fish Jokes) , Riddles
Copyright © 2014 - Howdy Doody - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Submitted BY: Crosley Fields

Hunting Accident

A guy is out hunting. He stops to pee, leans his weapon against a tree and….just then a gust of wind blew, the gun fell over and discharged, shooting him in the genitals.
Several hours later, lying in a hospital bed, he was approached by his doctor. “Well sir, I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that you are going to be okay. The damage was local to your groin, there was very little internal damage and we were able to remove all of the buckshot.”
“What’s the bad news?” asked the hunter. “The bad news is that there was some pretty extensive buckshot damage done to your willy which left quite a few holes in it. I’m going to have to refer you to my sister.”
“Well I guess that isn't too bad,” the hunter replied. “Is your sister a plastic surgeon?” Not exactly,” answered the doctor. “She’s a flute player in the Boston Symphony Orchestra. She’s going to teach you where to put your fingers so you don’t piss in your eye.”

Categories: Funny Thoughts , Sports Jokes (Hunting Jokes) , Sex Jokes (Private Parts) , Profession Jokes (ER Doctor Jokes) , Art & Music Jokes
Anonymous