Husband and Dog

Q: What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
A: After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.

Why Women Talk More than Men

Q: Why do women talk more than men, and why are men smarter than women?
A: Because women have four lips and men have two heads!

The Yuppie, Dink, Rub, and Wife

Three guys and a lady were sitting at the bar talking about their professions. The first guy says, "I'm a YUPPIE. You know, young, urban, professional." The second guy says, "I'm a DINK. You know, double income, no kids." The third guy says, "I'm a RUB. You know, rich urban biker." They turn to the woman and ask, "So what are you?" The woman replies, "I'm a WIFE. You know - Wash, Iron, F***, Etc."