Women's Rights

WOMEN'S RIGHTS
The following took place at an international conference for women's rights.
The first speaker, a lady from England stood and said, "During last year's conference, we spoke about being more assertive with our husbands. Well, after the conference, I went home and told my husband, Barrington, that I would no longer cook for him and that he would have to do it himself. After the first day, I saw nothing. The second day, I saw nothing, but on the third day, I saw that he had cooked a wonderful roast lamb." (The crowd cheered).
The second speaker from Russia, stood up and said, "After last year's conference, I went home and told my husband, Ivan, that I would no longer do his laundry and that he would have to do it himself. The first day, I saw nothing. After the second day, I saw nothing, but on the third day, I saw that he had done not only his own washing, but mine as well. (The crowd again cheered).
The third speaker, a Jamaican lady, stood up and said," After lass year's conference, I wen home and tole dat lazy husband of mines, Dingo Jack, dat I was froo pickin up his beer cans, cookin his tucker and washing his undaweah and dat he was goin to haf to do dem himself. (The crowd went wild with cheering and clapping that lasted for five long minutes). She continued... "Afta da first day, I nevah see nuffing. Afta da second day I nevah see nuffing,  but afta da fird day, I could see a little bit out of my leff eye."

C&A

A guy walks up to his friend ans says ''why do you have 'R' and 'L' on your hands?'' He replies ''So I know which is my left and which is my right'' 'Oh'' says the guy ''Now I know why my wife has C and A written on her panties!''

Neil Armstrong True Story

When Apollo Mission Astronaut Neil Armstrong first walked on the moon, he not only said his famous "One Small Step for Man, One Giant Leap for Mankind" statement, but followed it by several remarks - usual communication traffic between him, the other astronauts and Mission Control. Before he re-entered the lander, he made the enigmatic remark "Good luck, Mr. Gorsky." Many people at NASA thought it was a casual remark concerning some rival Soviet Cosmonaut; however, upon checking, there was no Gorsky in either the Russian nor American space programs. Over the years, many people have questioned him as to what the "Good luck, Mr. Gorsky" statement meant. On July 5, in Tampa Bay, FL, while answering questions following a speech, a reporter brought up the 26 year old question to Armstrong. He finally responded. It seems that Mr. Gorsky had finally died and so Armstrong felt he could answer the question: "When I was a kid, I was playing baseball with my brother in the backyard. He had hit a fly ball which landed in front of my neighbors' bedroom window. The neighbors were Mr. and Mrs. Gorsky. As I leaned down to pick up the ball, I heard Mrs. Gorsky shouting at Mr. Gorsky, "Oral sex? Oral sex you want? You'll get oral sex when the kid next door walks on the moon!" True fact.