If Men Ruled The World

• Lifeguards could remove citizens from beaches for violating the "public ugliness" ordinance.
• Car rental agencies would rent tanks.
• Telephones would automatically cut off after 30 seconds of conversation.
• It would be perfectly legal to steal a sports car as long as you returned it within 24 hours with a full tank of gas.
• Get Out of Jail Free cards would be considered legal documents.

Feminists to Change Lightbulb

Q: How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: 20: one to change the bulb, the rest to make a documentary all about it.

Every Precaution

I must take every precaution not to get pregnant," said Edna to Priscilla. "But I thought you said your hubby had a vasectomy,"  Priscilla responded. "He did. That's why I have to take every precaution."