It has been studied and determined that the most often used sexual position for married couples is the doggy position. The husband sits up and begs, while the wife rolls over and plays dead.
History Remembering Clinton
Q: How will history remember Bill Clinton?
A: The President after Bush.
The Best Memory.
Three guys are debating who has the best memory. First guy says, "I can remember the first day of my First Grade class." Second guy says, "I can remember my first day at Nursery School!" Not to be outdone, the third guy says, "Hell, that's nothing... I can remember going to the senior prom with my father, and coming home with my mother!"
Q: What do you do with 365 used rubbers?
A: Melt them down, make a tire, and call it a Goodyear.
Laying Down the Rules
A typical macho man married a typical good looking lady, and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules. "I'll be home when I want, if I want, what time I want, and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table, unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing, and card playing when I want with my old buddies, and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?" His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night, whether you're here or not!"