Redneck Sex Lesson
Ma and Pa are sitting out on the front porch one day. "You know what? Junior's 21. It's time we taught him about sex. Junior, get out here!" Junior runs out. "Junior, I think it's time to teach you about sex." "Sex," says Junior. "What's sex?" "Well," Pa says. "Take off your clothes, Ma." So Ma takes off her clothes. "You see that hole in Ma? Watch this." Pa starts doing it right there on the porch. A little while goes by and Junior's younger brother, Bubba comes out on the porch and asks what's going on. "Ma and Pa are teaching me about sex." "Sex? What's sex?" "See that hole in Pa? Watch this!"
It has been studied and determined that the most often used sexual position for married couples is the doggy position. The husband sits up and begs, while the wife rolls over and plays dead.
History Remembering Clinton
Q: How will history remember Bill Clinton?
A: The President after Bush.
The Best Memory.
Three guys are debating who has the best memory. First guy says, "I can remember the first day of my First Grade class." Second guy says, "I can remember my first day at Nursery School!" Not to be outdone, the third guy says, "Hell, that's nothing... I can remember going to the senior prom with my father, and coming home with my mother!"
Q: What do you do with 365 used rubbers?
A: Melt them down, make a tire, and call it a Goodyear.