Muscle Contraction

Professor Higgins at the University of Sydney was giving a lecture on 'Involuntary Muscle Contraction' to the first year medical students.  This was not an exciting subject and the professor decided to lighten up the mood.  He pointed to a young woman in the front row and asked,  "Do you know what your asshole is doing while you're having an orgasm?"
She replied, "Probably golfing with his buddies."
It took 45 minutes to restore order in the classroom.

Great News

This 55- year- old woman is naked, jumping up and down on her bed, laughing and singing. Her husband walks into the bedroom and sees her. He watches her a while then says, "You look ridiculous; what on earth are you doing?" She says, "I just got the results of my annual physical and my doctor said I have the breasts of an eighteen-year-old." She starts laughing and jumping again. He says, "Yeah, right. And what did he say about your 55-year-old ass?" She says, "Your name never came up!"

2024 Super Bowl

IF ANYONE IS INTERESTED... A friend of mine has two tickets for the 2024 Super Bowl, both box seats. He paid $11,500 each. It comes with ride to and from the airport, lunch, dinner and $400.00 bar tab. Also a backstage pass to the winner's locker room. He didn't realize last year when he bought them, it would be on the same day as his wedding. If you are interested, he is looking for someone to take his place... It's at St Paul's Church, in Orlando at 3 pm. Her name is Ashley. She's 5'4", about 115 lbs, and a great cook. She loves to fish and hunt. She'll be the one in the white dress.