Funny Thoughts

ATM Lady

I was at an ATM and this old lady asked me to help check her balance, so I pushed her over.

Categories: Funny Thoughts , One-Liner Jokes
Anonymous

Holiday Compliment

Listen, if you're going to someone's house for Thanksgiving dinner, complement their baseboards. That is what they are spending today cleaning.

Categories: Funny Thoughts , Holiday Jokes
Submitted BY: MEG

Irish Wish

An Irishman is sitting at the end of a bar. He sees a lamp at the end of the table. He walks down to it and rubs it, and out pops a genie. It says, "I will give you three wishes."
The Irishman thinks awhile, finally he says, "I want a beer that never is empty." With that, the genie makes a poof sound and on the bar is a bottle of beer. The Irishman starts drinking it and right before it is gone, it starts to refill. The genie asks about his next two wishes. The Irishman says, "I want two more of these."

Categories: Ethnic / Country Jokes (Irish Jokes) , Funny Thoughts , Alcohol Jokes (Beer Jokes) , Bar Jokes (Walks Into a Bar) , Genie Jokes , Holiday Jokes (St. Patrick's Day Jokes)
Anonymous