Jokes about Families - Son Jokes

Teaching Moment

A man is driving his five-year-old to a friend’s house when another car races in front and cuts them off, nearly causing an accident. “Douche bag!” the father yells. A moment later he realizes the indiscretion, pulls over, and turns to face his son. “Your daddy just said a bad word,” he says. “I was angry at that driver, but that was no excuse for what I said. It was wrong. But just because I said it doesn’t make it right, and I don’t ever want to hear you saying it. Is that clear?” His son looks at him and says: “Too late, douche bag.”

Categories: Funny Thoughts , Jokes about Families (Father Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Son Jokes) , Insult Jokes (Stupid Insults)
Anonymous

Get out of Bed

A woman realizes her son has not yet gotten out of bed for school. She goes into his bedroom and tells him to get up or he will miss breakfast. "No," the son replies. "I don't wanna go to school!" "You HAVE to go to school," the mother scolds. "No! The kids are mean to me, the teachers don't like me, and the lunches are icky." "You WILL go to school, young man," the mother warns. "Why? Why do I have to go to school today?" the son asks. The mother is about to lose her patience. "Because you're the principal, now get out of bed!"

Categories: Profession Jokes (Teacher Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Son Jokes) , Jokes about Kids (School Kids Jokes) , School Jokes (Elementary School Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Mother's Day Wind Down

On Mothers Day, the mother of three little kids was showered with kisses, hugs, cheerios for breakfast in bed, dandelions from the yard, and crayon drawings. As much as she loved it, all the activity made the house a bigger mess than usual. After a long day, she finally got the kids in bed. All she wanted to do was clean up and relax.
She put on an old gown from the back of the closet, went into the bathroom and coated her face with thick, white facial cream. Then she started washing her hair.
But the kids were not settling down. She could hear them talking, giggling, jumping on the beds. Finally in exasperation she wrapped her head in a towel, ran into their bedroom and sternly told them to calm down and go to sleep.
After she left, she overheard the youngest one ask, “Who was that?”

Categories: Jokes about Families (Mother Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Son Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Daughter Jokes) , Holiday Jokes
Anonymous