Q: Why can't Stevie Wonder see his friends?
A: Because he's married
The Blind Golfers
A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers...
Engineer: What's with these guys? We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!
Doctor: I don't know, but I've never seen such ineptitude!
Pastor: Hey, here comes the greens keeper. Let's have a word with him. [dramatic pause] Hi George. Say, what's with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?
George: Oh, yes, that's a group of blind fire fighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime.
The group was silent for a moment.
Pastor: That's so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight.
Doctor: Good idea. And I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist buddy and see if there's anything he can do for them.
Engineer: Why can't these guys play at night?
Q: Why do Lawyers smell?
A: So the blind can hate them, too!
Q: How can you identify an blind pirate?
A: He's the one with patches over both eyes.
Guide Dogs Only
Why do shops have signs that say "guide dogs only"? The dogs can't read and their owners are blind?