Disability Jokes

Blind Shopping

A blind man with a seeing eye dog at his side walks into a grocery store. The man walks to the middle of the store, picks up the dog by the tail, and starts swinging the dog around in circles over his head. The store manager, who has seen all this, thinks this is quite strange. So, he decides to find out what's going on. The store manager approaches the blind man swinging the dog and says, "Pardon me. May I help you with something?" The blind man says,
"No thanks. I'm just looking around."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Buddies Go Inside Europe

Two friends, named Harry and George, go on a trip to Europe, where they have a great time. When they get back, Harry meets up with his pal Phil to tell him all about it. "One of the first places we went to was the leaning tower of Pisa. It was really neat." "Cool. Did you go up inside it?" "No, we couldn't, since George is a cripple. But we did go to visit the Cathedral of Notre Dame in Paris. That was really neat." "Cool. Did you go up inside it?" "No, we couldn't, since George is a cripple. But we did go to visit Big Ben in London." "Cool. Did you go up inside it?" "No, we couldn't, since George is a cripple. But we did attend mass at the Vatican." "Really? What happened?" "Well, the Pope made the sign of the cross, and George dropped his right crutch, and he dropped his left crutch." "Cool. What happened then?" "George fell on his ass. He's a cripple, you know."

Anonymous

Blind Farmer

The blind farmer was often taken for a walk in the fields by a kind neighbor. However kindly the neighbor might have been, he was undoubtedly a coward. When a bull charged towards them one day, he abandoned the blind man. The bull, puzzled by a lack of fear, nudged the farmer in the back. He turned very quickly, caught the bull by the horns and threw it to the ground with a bump that left it breathless. "Aidan," said the neighbor, "I never knew you were so strong."
"Faith, and if I could have got that fella off the handlebars of the bicycle I'd have thrashed him properly."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous