We're sorry, but it appears that you are using an anonymous proxy. To prevent fraudulent voting, we don't allow votes from anonymous proxies.

This contest requires users to be registered in order to vote.

You must be a registered user to submit a joke.  But registering is FREE and don’t worry, we only need a name and e-mail address, and we don’t sell or share your information with any third-parties (see Privacy Policy).

You must complete account validation before submitting jokes. Click here to go to your profile page to complete the process.

We’re sorry, but your browser settings indicate that you don’t want to be tracked.  You can either disable that setting or simply register for a FREE account, so we’ll know that you want us to track your preferences and feedback.  Don’t worry, we only need a name and e-mail address and we don’t sell or share your information with any third-parties (see Privacy Policy).


The best jokes and joke writers!

Substitution

My child doesn't eat meat, what to substitute it with?

A dog, dogs eat meat.

Going To Jail

I can't talk to you right now, tell me, where will you be in 10 years?

Coma Insult

Why don't you slip into something more comfortable, like a coma.

NSA Present

Maybe if we all emailed the Constitution to each other…

…the NSA would finally read it.

Vaccination

Q: Why are vaccinated kids are more likely to have autism?

A: Because they're still alive.