Grey and Jumpy
Q: What's grey and wrinkly and jumps every twenty seconds?
A: An elephant with hiccups!
Little Johnny's Alphabet
Little Johnny is in class. The teacher is going through the alphabet, having each child think up a word that starts with a letter. They get to "W", and the teacher figures Little Johnny can't think up anything dirty with a "W" so she calls on him. "Womb!", Little Johnny says. "That's a good word, Johnny", teacher says. "Is that as in, where babies come from?" she asks. "No," says Johnny, "that's the sound elephants make when they're screwing, you know, 'Womb! Womb! Womb!"
Q: Why can't elephants go swimming at the pool?
A: Because they can't keep their trunks up.
Q: Why do elephants do well in school?
A: Because they have a lot of grey matter!
Q: Why are elephants such poor dancers?
A: Because they have two left feet.