Q: How do you get out of an elephants stomach?
A: Run around until you're pooped out!
Elephant and Poodle
Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant with a poodle?
A: A dead poodle with an 18 inch asshole.
Q: How do you get down from an elephant?
A: You don't. You get down from a duck.
Teacher: "Name six wild animals."
Pupil: "Four elephants and two lions!"
Barnum and Bailey's Circus
Barnum & Bailey was transferring the circus from one town to another. The elephants were connected trunk to tail. They came along a railroad crossing and as the elephants were halfway across the tracks, a train came along and killed two of them. Shortly thereafter, B&M Railroad received an invoice from Barnum and Bailey for $10,000. B&M immediately called Barnum & Bailey and requested an explanation for the charge, writing, "What is the cost of a new elephant?" Barnum & Bailey responded, "$1,000 each." B&M responded, "But, we only killed two of them!" Barnum & Bailey said, "Yes, but you pulled the assholes out of eight others."