Absinthe Girlfriend

My last girlfriend was the Green Lady... of course I'm talking about absinthe.

Going To A Lecture

There was a man, who was in no shape to drive, so he wisely left his car parked and walked home. As he was walking unsteadily along, he was stopped by a policeman. "What are you doing out here at 2 A.M.?" said the officer. "I'm going to a lecture." the man said. "And who is going to give a lecture at this hour?" the cop asked. "My wife." said the man.

The Beer Prayer

• Our lager,
• Which art in barrels,
• Hollowed be thy drink.
• I will be drunk,
• At home as in the travern.
• Give us this day our foamy head,
• And forgive us our spillages,
• As we forgive those who spill against us.
• And lead us not into incarceration,
• But deliver us from hangerovers.
• For thine is the beer.
• The bitter and
• The lager
• Forever and ever,
• Barmen.