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Profession Jokes - Farmer Jokes
Farmer Filing for Divorce
A farmer walked into an attorney's office wanting to file for a divorce. The attorney asked, "May I help you?" The farmer said, "Yea, I want to get one of those dayvorce's." The attorney said, "well do you have any grounds?" The farmer said, "Yea, I got about 140 acres." The attorney said, " No, you don't understand, do you have a case?" The farmer said, "No, I don't have a Case, but I have a John Deere." The attorney said, "No you don't understand, I mean do you have a grudge?" The farmer said, "Yea I got a grudge, that's where I park my John Deere." The attorney said, "No sir, I mean do you have a suit?" The farmer said, "Yes sir, I got a suit. I wear it in church on Sundays." The exasperated attorney said, "Well sir, does your wife beat you up or anything?" The farmer said, "No sir, we both get up about 4:30." Finally, the attorney says, "Okay, let me put it this way. "WHY DO YOU WANT A DIVORCE?" And the farmer says, "Well, I can never have a meaningful conversation with her."
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Sex With The Pig
A farmer walks into his bedroom carrying a sheep under his arm. He walks over to his wife, who's laying in bed. "See!" he yells, "this is the pig I have to have sex with whenever you get one of your headaches!" The wife says, "You know that's a sheep under your arm, don't you?" The farmer says, "I wasn't talking to you."
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Frog Leg Ranch
Q: Why did the farmer sell his frog leg ranch?
A: He found out it was a 'rough toad to hoe.'
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