Too Much Analysis

Two psychiatrists were walking down a hall. One turned to the other and said, "Hello." The other one thought, "I wonder what he meant by that."

He Didn't Make It

A 10pm curfew was imposed in Belfast. Everybody had to be off the streets or risk being shot. However one citizen was shot at 9.45pm. "Why did you do that?" the soldier was asked by his superior officer. "I know where he lives," he replied, "and he wouldn't have made it."

Give Them a Shock

Q: Why do psychiatrists give their patients shock treatment?
A: To prepare them for the bill!