Operation

As the lawyer slowly came out of the anesthesia after surgery, he said, "Why are all the blinds drawn, doctor?"
"There's a big fire across the street," the doctor replied. "We didn't want you to think the operation was a failure

Bending

The old man was saying to his doctor, "You know, Doc, when I was young, it was as hard as a rock. As I got a little older, I could bend it a little and now I can bend it a lot. Does that mean I'm getting stronger?"

Horse Play

An unconscious man arrives at a hospital. After a series of x-rays, the radiologist discovered the man had several plastic horses in his anus.
The doctors have declared his condition as "stable".