Uni Zoo

A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog. It was a Shih Tzu.

Two Thousand and Pinches

Q: What weighs 2,000 pounds and pinches?
A: An elephant wearing a tight tuxedo.

Foreign Body Chip

Q: What do you call a foreign body in a chip pan?
A: An Unidentified Frying Object!