Top 10 Reasons Why Hurricane Season is Like Christmas

Top Ten Reasons Hurricane Season is Like Christmas
10. Decorating the house (boarding up windows)
9. Dragging out boxes that haven't been used since last season (camping gear, flashlights)
8. Last minute shopping in crowded stores
7. Regular TV shows pre-empted for "specials"
6. Family coming to stay with you
5. Family and friends from out-of-state calling
4. Buying food you don't normally buy ... and in large quantities
3. Days off from work
2. Candles
 
And the number one reason Hurricane Season is like Christmas...
1. At some point you know you're going to have a tree in your house!

Frozen Windows

Wife texts husband on a cold winter morning... 
'Windows frozen; won't open'
Husband texts back, 'Pour warm water over it and gently tap edges with hammer'
Five minutes later wife texts back, 'Computer really messed up now.'

Island Goodbye

Q: How do you say goodbye to an Indonesian?
A: With a big wave.