U.S. State Jokes - Texas Jokes

Nurse Conversations

Several nurses on break in the Boston General cafeteria were discussing boyfriends, past and present. Suddenly, a nurse from New York City said, "Well, I have discovered men are all alike!" Whereupon, a pert little nurse from Dallas laughed and slapped the table. "Gal," she said, "men are all ah like, too!"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Jump Out of the Plane

An Englishman, Frenchman, Mexican, and Texan were flying across country on a small plane when the pilot comes on the loud speaker and says " We're having mechanical problems and the only way we can make it to the next airport is for 3 of you to open the door and jump. At least one of you can survive" The four open the door and look out below. The Englishman takes a deep breath and hollers "God Save The Queen" and jumps.The Frenchman gets really inspired and hollers "Viva La France" and he also jumps.This really pumps up the Texan so he hollers "Remember the Alamo" and he grabs the Mexican and throws him out of the plane.

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

200 Midgets

The flight was coming into Dallas when a combination of mechanical errors and unstable weather caused the plane to start plummeting to the ground!  The pilot feverishly worked his controls, and finally, the engines roared back to life in time to prevent the plane from crashing!  As the plane landed, airport officials rushed to the disembarking gate and were stunned to see 200 midgets shakily get off the plane. Finally the crew got off the plane and the local manager of the airline came up to congratulate him on his perseverance under extreme odds.  As the official and the pilot were talking, the official commented how unusual it was that there were so many midgets on the flight. "Those weren't midgets," the pilot replied. "Those were Texans with all the shit scared out of them!"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous