Golfer Hit the Ball a Long Way

A golfer hit his drive 300 yards right down the middle on the first hole. When it came down, however, it hit a sprinkler and the ball went sideways into the woods. He was angry, but he went into the woods and hit a very hard 2 iron which hit a tree and bounced back straight a thim. It hit him in the temple and killed him. He was at the Pearly Gates and St. Peter looked at the big book and said, "I see you were a golfer, is that correct?" "Yes, I am," he replied. St Peter then said, "Do you hit the ball a long way?" The golfer replied, "You bet. After all, I got here in 2, didn't I?"

Take A Year Off

Tyson's psychologist told Mike to take a year off, he obviously misunderstood.... and good thing he didn't say two!

Basketball Players

Q: Why aren't basketball players asked to stay for dinner?
A: Because they're always dribbling!