No Reflection

My sister's college room mate, who isn't very keen on sports, commented on the shoe polish streaks under the player's eyes.
She said, "I just don't get it, what do those black things even do?"
I replied, "Well, play football, mostly."

A Game of Golf

A man walked into the clubhouse and noticed a friend sitting in a corner wearing a neck brace. He sat down and asked his mate what happened."Well, I was playing golf and I hit my ball into the rough," replied his friend. "Then I met a chick who was looking for her ball too. Finding mine, I thought I'd give her a hand. There was a cow nearby and I noticed that every time the cow twitched its tail there was a flash of white. So I went over to it and lifted its tail and sure enough there was the ball. I called out to the chick and said, 'Lady, does this look like yours?' And the bitch hit me in the neck with her driver!"

In the ravine.

One day, Jim and Bob are out golfing. Jim slices his ball deep into a wooded ravine. He grabs his 8-iron and proceeds down the embankment into the ravine in search of his ball. The brush is quite thick, but Jim searches diligently and suddenly he spots something shiny. As he gets closer, he realizes that the shiny object is in fact an 8-iron in the hands of a skeleton lying near an old golf ball. Jim calls out to his golfing partner in excitement, "Hey Bob, come here, I got trouble down here." Bob comes running over to the edge of the ravine and calls out, "What's the matter Jim?" Jim shouts back in a nervous voice, "Throw me my 7-iron. You can't get out of here with an 8-iron!"