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The best jokes and joke writers!

A Hearing Problem

An elderly man thinking his wife was losing her hearing went about 20' behind her and asked  "Can you hear me sweetheart?' No reply. Moved to 10' and inquired again.  No reply. 5' and not a word.  A few inches behind ear, he asked "Can you hear me now honey"? His wife said "For the fourth time, yes."

Catching a Mermaid

Three fishermen catch a mermaid. If they agree to set her free, she will grant them each a wish. The first guy says, "OK, I want you to double my I.Q." Immediately, the guy recites Shakespeare flawlessly. The second guy asks the mermaid to triple his I.Q. Suddenly, he's spouting complicated mathematical solutions. Impressed, the last guy asks the mermaid to quintuple his I.Q. The mermaid hesitates and asks, "Are you sure that's what you really want?" "Absolutely!" says the man. The mermaid smiles. Instantly, the third man turns into a woman.

Open Minded

Q: Why does a penis have a hole in the end?

A: So men can be open minded.

Dumber Sex

Diamonds are a girl's best friend. Dogs are man's best friend. So which is the dumber sex?

Husband and Dog

Q: What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?

A: After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.