Brand Name Condoms

Which condom would you use?

• Nike Condoms: Just do it.
• Toyota Condoms: Oh what a feeling.
• Diet Pepsi Condoms: You got the right one, baby.
• Pringles Condoms: Once you pop, you can't stop.
• Mentos Condoms: The fresh maker.
• Flinstones Vitamins Condom Pack: Ten million strong and growing.
• Secret Condoms: Strong enough for a man, but ph balanced for a woman.
• Macintosh Condoms: It does more, it costs less, it's that simple.
• Ford Condoms: The best never rest.
• Chevy Condoms: Like a Rock.
• Dial Condoms: Aren't you glad you use it? Don't you wish everybody did?
• New York Lotto Condoms: Cause hey -- you never know.
• Avis Condoms: Trying harder than ever.
• EverReady Condoms: Keeps going and going
• KFC Condoms: Finger-Licking Good.
• Coca Cola Condoms: Always the Real Thing.
• Lays Condoms: Betcha can't have just one.

Why Beer is Better than Women

1. YOU CAN ENJOY A BEER ALL MONTH LONG.
2. BEER STAINS WASH OUT.
3. YOU DON'T HAVE TO WINE AND DINE BEER.
4. YOUR BEER WILL ALWAYS WAIT PATIENTLY FOR YOU IN THE CAR WHILE YOU PLAY FOOTBALL.
5. WHEN YOUR BEER GOES FLAT, YOU TOSS IT OUT.
6. BEER IS NEVER LATE.
7. A BEER DOESN'T GET JEALOUS WHEN YOU GRAB ANOTHER BEER.
8. HANGOVERS GO AWAY.
9. BEER LABELS COME OFF WITHOUT A FIGHT.
10. WHEN YOU GO TO A BAR, YOU KNOW YOU CAN ALWAYS PICK UP A BEER.
11. BEER NEVER HAS A HEADACHE.
12. YOU DON'T HAVE TO DRIVE A BEER HOME IN THE MORNING.
13. A BEER WON'T GET UPSET IF YOU COME HOME WITH ANOTHER BEER.
14. IF YOU POUR A BEER RIGHT, YOU'LL ALWAYS GET GOOD HEAD.
15. A BEER ALWAYS GOES DOWN EASY.
16. YOU CAN HAVE MORE THAN ONE BEER IN A NIGHT AND NOT FEEL GUILTY.
17. YOU CAN SHARE A BEER WITH YOUR FRIENDS.
18. YOU ALWAYS KNOW YOU'RE THE FIRST ONE TO POP A BEER.
19. BEER IS ALWAYS WET.
20. BEER DOESN'T DEMAND EQUALITY.
21. YOU CAN HAVE A BEER IN PUBLIC.
22. A BEER DOESN'T CARE WHEN YOU COME.
23. A FRIGID BEER IS A GOOD BEER.
24. YOU DON'T HAVE TO WASH A BEER BEFORE IT TASTES GOOD.
25. IF YOU CHANGE BEERS YOU DON'T HAVE TO PAY ALIMONY.

Her Body is a Temple

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today!