Sex Jokes - Denied Sex Jokes

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The Potent Barrel

An old sailing ship is becalmed at sea with a full complement of sailors. They are stuck there for days and days with nothing to do. One morning the captain decides he is going to lay on some entertainment for the men. He orders a barrel to be placed on the top deck. It has an orifice in the side and he invites each one of the men to "take the pleasures" of the barrel to their heart's content. Soon a full-fledged hedonistic orgy is underway. The men are cheerful once again and morale is boosted. Things reach such a frenzy that even the captain's dog has a go. Once the party is over and the barrel is full of the team's spirit, it is bunged up and thrown overboard. The ship sails away. A few days later the barrel comes ashore on the beach of a deserted island in the middle of nowhere. The only inhabitants of the island are the nuns who have founded their convent there. The nuns find the barrel and open it. They don't recognize the contents and take it to be wax, from which they fashion candles. Of course, nuns being nuns, they use the candles in the way only nuns can. Nine months later an inordinate number of babies appear inexplicably on the island. One of the nuns is very guilty about her sins and approaches the Mother Superior for confession. "Forgive me, Mother. I have had a baby." The Mother Superior says, "That's nothing, my child. I've had puppies."

Categories: Sex Jokes (Denied Sex Jokes) , Religion Jokes (Nun / Priest Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

President Clinton

Q: There was no action at the White House the past few days, hear about this?
A: Yea, I guess it was labeled a "No Open Fly" zone!

Categories: Word Play Jokes , Sex Jokes (Denied Sex Jokes) , Riddles
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Married or Single Man Envy

Q:  Why do a married man and his single male friend envy each other?
A: Each one thinks the other is having sex more often.

Categories: Sexist Jokes (About Men) , Sex Jokes (Denied Sex Jokes) , Riddles
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous