Share this joke via Email (Step 2)
Share this Joke on Twitter
Registered Users Only
Registered Users Only
Get link for other Social Networks
- Home
- Popular Jokes
- New Releases
- Joke of the Day
- Browse By Category
- Browse Writers
- Contests
- Submit Joke
- Contact Us
- Info
All rights reserved.
- Home
- >
- Categories
- >
- Sex Jokes
- >
- All
Sex Jokes
Three Chinese Tortures
One day a man goes into a hotel and asks for a room to stay in. The manager gives him a room and warns him not to mess around with his daughter or he'll get the "Three Chinese Tortures." On his way to his room the man sees the manager's daughter. She's very beautiful and he figures he'll endure whatever he has to. So he has his way with the daughter and retires to his room. The next morning when he wakes up he finds a rock on his chest. There is a note on it, reading: "FIRST CHINESE TORTURE: ROCK ON CHEST." The man laughs and throws the rock out the window. Then he sees a sign on the nightstand that says: ''SECOND CHINESE TORTURE: LEFT NUT TIED TO ROCK." He goes flying out the window after the rock but, as he does, he spots a sign on the windowsill that proclaims: "THIRD CHINESE TORTURE: RIGHT NUT TIED TO BED POST."
- 1
- 2
- 0
Glow in the Dark Condoms
Q: Why do they make glow in the dark condoms?
A: So that gay men can play Star Wars.
- 2
- 2
- 0
Finding the Right Girl to Marry
An extraordinarily handsome man decided he had the God-given responsibility to marry the perfect woman so they could produce children beyond comparison. With that as his mission he began searching for the perfect woman. After a diligent, but fruitless, search up and down the east coast, he started to head west. Shortly thereafter he met a farmer who had three stunning, gorgeous daughters that positively took his breath away. So he explained his mission to the farmer, asking for permission to marry one of them. The farmer simply replied, "They're all lookin' to get married, so you came to the right place. Look them over and select the one you want. "The man dated the first daughter. The next day the farmer asked for the man's opinion. "Well" said the man, " She's just a weeeeee bit, not that you can hardly notice, but pigeon-toed. "The farmer nodded and suggested the man date one of the other girls; so the man went out with the second daughter. The next day, the farmer again asked how things went. "Well," the man replied, "She's just a weeeee bit, not that you can hardly tell, cross-eyed. "The farmer nodded and suggested he date the third girl to see if things might be better. So he did. The next morning the man rushed in exclaiming, "She's perfect, just perfect! She's the one I want to marry!" So they were wed right away. Months later the baby was born. When the man visited nursery he was horrified, the baby was the ugliest, most pathetic human you can imagine. He rushed to his father-in-law asking how such a thing could happen considering the parents. "Well," explained the farmer, "She was just a weeeee bit, not that you could hardly tell, pregnant when you met her."
- 1
- 2
- 0
