Religion Jokes - God Jokes

Top 10 Reasons God Created Eve!

Top 10 Reasons God Created Eve

  1. God worried that Adam would frequently become lost in the garden because he would not ask for directions
  2. God knew that Adam would one day require someone to locate and hand him the TV remote.
  3. God knew that Adam would never go out and get himself a new fig leaf when his seat wore out and would, therefore, need Eve to go get one for him.
  4. God knew that Adam would never be able to make a doctor's, dentist, or haircut appointment for himself.
  5. God knew that Adam would never be able to remember which night to put the garbage on the curb.
  6. God knew that if the world was to be populated, men would never be able to handle the pain and discomfort of childbearing.
  7. As "Keeper of the Garden," Adam would never remember where he left his tools.
  8. Apparently, Adam needed someone to blame his troubles on when God caught him hiding in the garden.
  9. As the Bible says, "It is not good for man to be alone!"
  10. When God finished the creation of Adam, He stepped back, scratched His head, and said, "I can do better than THAT!"

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Anonymous

Good Holiday Deed

A worker in the post office is sorting through the mail when she sees a letter addressed to "God." She opens it up and finds a handwritten note from an old lady. The note says she desperately needs $200 dollars to pay her heating bills, and she has nowhere else to turn. She hoped God could figure out a way to send her the money. It’s getting close to holiday season, so the kind hearted postal worker decides to take up a collection. She ends up getting $150 and mails the cash to the lady. A few weeks later, there’s another letter addressed to God from the same old woman. The worker opens it up, and it says: "Dear God, Thank you so much for the money you sent. It helped me through a difficult time and I’m glad that I have faith. However, I received only $150. Those damn postal workers must have the other $50!"

Anonymous

Conceited Doctors

Q: What is the difference between a brain surgeon and God?
A: God doesn't think he's a brain surgeon!

Anonymous