Fat and Skinny Women

A fat woman and a skinny woman were sitting together at a restaurant. "Men prefer thin women," said the skinny woman. "Really? Did your boyfriend tell you that?" said the fat one. "No, your boyfriend told me that!"

Saxophone

Q: Why did Bill Clinton give up the saxophone?
A: Because he had a hor-monica.

54 Year Old Accountant

A 54 year old accountant leaves a letter for his wife one Friday evening and read's:
Dear Wife, (that's what he called her) I am 54 and by the time you receive this letter I will be at the Grand Hotel with my beautiful and sexy 18 year old secretary.
When he arrived at the hotel there was a letter waiting for him as follows:
Dear Husband, (that's what she called him) I too am 54 and by the time you receive this letter I will be at the Hilton Hotel with my handsome and virile 18 year old toy boy. You being an accountant will therefore appreciate that 18 goes into 54 many many more times than 54 goes into 18!!!!