Relationship Jokes

Christmas Parrot

A woman is looking for a Christmas present for her husband. She walks by a pet shop and sees a beautiful parrot. A tag on the cage says $50. “Why so little?” she asks. The store manager says, “This bird used to live in a house of prostitution. It has kind of a vulgar mouth.” The woman decides to buy the parrot anyway. She brings the parrot home and puts his cage near the Christmas tree. First thing the bird says is, “New house, new madam.” She's a little shocked but figures that’s not so bad. When her two daughters get home from school, the bird sees them and says, “New house, new madam, new girls.” The woman is surprised, but she figures the parrot will straighten out once it figures out who everybody is. A little while later, the woman’s husband, Frank, comes home from work. As he walks in the door, the bird says: “Hi Frank.”

Categories: Animal Jokes (Bird Jokes) , Sex Jokes (Prostitute Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Cheater Jokes) , Holiday Jokes (Christmas Jokes)
Anonymous

Man and Wife Wrinkles

Man to wife: ''Boy, you are getting old, look at all the wrinkles you are getting!'' Wife: ''They aren't wrinkles, they're laugh lines!'' Man: ''Nothing is that freakin' funny!''

Categories: Relationship Jokes (Marriage Jokes) , Appearance Jokes
Anonymous

Who Is In Control

At a recent interview, it seems that Bill Clinton broke out in rage after being asked a line of questions about him being controlled. Interviewer: "Who pulls your strings, Bill? What special interests control you?" Clinton (visibly upset): "You leave Hillary out of this!"

Categories: Political Jokes (About Democrats) , Profession Jokes (Politician Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Man Criticizes Woman) , Relationship Jokes (Marriage Jokes)
Anonymous