New Women's Study

There is a new study out about women.  85% of women think their ass has grown too big since getting married. 10% of women think their ass is just as big as it was when they got married. The other 5% say that they don't care, they love him and would have married him anyway.

Boyfriend Buying Flowers

A blonde and a brunette walk past a flower shop and see the brunette's boyfriend buying flowers. She sighs and says, "Oh crap, my boyfriend is buying me flowers again. Now, I'll be expected to spend the weekend on my back with my legs in the air." The blonde says, "Don't you have a vase?"

Bra Shopping

My wife was trying to describe what it's like shopping for a bra. She said, "It'd be like trying to find something to hold your dick that looks nice and feels good."
I looked her in the eye and said, "I did."