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Jokes about Kids

Bedtime Prayers
A little boy was kneeling beside his bed with his mother and grandmother and softly saying his prayers, "Dear God, please bless Mummy and Daddy and all the family and please give me a good night's sleep." Suddenly he looked up and shouted, "And don't forget to give me a bicycle for my birthday!!" "There is no need to shout like that," said his mother. "God isn't deaf." "No," said the little boy, "but Grandma is."
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Child's Baptism
After a hardy rainstorm filled all the potholes in the streets and alleys, a young mother watched her two little boys playing in the puddle through her kitchen window. The older of the two, a five-year-old lad, grabbed his sibling by the back of his head and shoved his face into the water hole. As the boy recovered and stood laughing and dripping, the mother runs to the yard in a panic. "Why on earth did you do that to your little brother?" she says as she shook the older boy in anger. "We were just playing church mommy," he said. "And I was just baptizing him... in the name of the Father, the Son and in... the hole-he-goes."
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Talks of Children
There were three women, a red head, a brunette and a blonde. They started talking about sex. The red headed one said, "I'm gonna have three babies." The brunette said she was going to have twins. The blonde started crying and the other two women asked her what was wrong. The blonde said she was gonna have baby dogs because she had sex doggy style!
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