Jokes about Families

Your Father is Drunk

To The Tune Of Santa Claus Is Coming To Town
Oh you better not shout, you better not cry, You better not pout, I'm tellin' you why, Daddy's home and I think he's drunk. He's walkin' real slow, he slurs when he speaks, I don't even think he's shaved in two weeks, Daddy's home and boy is he drunk, He spent most of our money on Johnny Walker Black And then he took all of the rest and lost it at the track. Sooooooo.... You better not pout, you better not cry, I don't like that look in his eye, Daddy's home and I think he's... Daddy's home and boy is he... Daddy's home and he's really drunk!

Categories: Bar Jokes (Drunk Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Father Jokes) , Dark Humor Jokes (Domestic Violence Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Wrong Pills

A young man walks up to his granny and asks her, "Granny, have you seen my pills? They're marked LSD." She replies, "Forget the pills, have you seen the dragon in the kitchen!?"

Categories: Drug Jokes (LSD Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Grandmother Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Thumb Sucking

A mom, dad and their two sons watch TV. The dad gives the mom a look, and they head upstairs. The two little boys wonder what they are doing and go upstairs to take a peek. "Well," says the older boy, "remember this when mom gets on your case for sucking your thumb."

Categories: Funny Thoughts , Word Play Jokes , Jokes about Families (Mother Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Father Jokes) , Sex Jokes (Oral Sex Jokes)
Anonymous