Still a Virgin?

Peter: "Hey, I bet you're still a virgin."
John: "Yeah, I was a virgin until last night ."
Peter: "No way, you had sex last night?"
John: "Yeah, just ask your sister."
Peter: "I don't have a sister."
John: "You will in about nine months."

Boyfriends

Q: How are daughter's boyfriends like cockroaches?
A: They hang around the kitchen and it's hard to get rid of them!

Too Honest

Mom, how did I come to this world? "Well, your father and I planted a seed together," the mother said.
"From that seed, we grew a marijuana plant, then smoked some weed and had sex on the washing machine."