Insult Jokes - Man Criticizes Woman

A Henpecked Husband

A henpecked husband was advised by a psychiatrist to assert himself. "You don't have to let your wife bully you," he said. "Go home and show her you're the boss." The husband decided to take the doctor's advice. He went home, slammed the door, shook his fist in his wife's face, and growled, "From now on you're taking orders from me. I want my supper right now, and when you get it on the table, go upstairs and lay out my clothes. Tonight I am going out with the boys. You are going to stay at home where you belong. Another thing, you know who is going to tie my bow tie?" "I certainly do," said his wife calmly, "the undertaker."

Categories: Dark Humor Jokes (Death Jokes) , Profession Jokes (Psychiatrist Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Man Criticizes Woman) , Relationship Jokes (Woman Criticizes Man)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Rear Access

I was fucking my secretary up the arse when my wife walked in.
She said, "You can't do this to me!"
I said, "I know... that's why I'm doing it to her.

Categories: Sex Jokes , Relationship Jokes (Cheater Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Man Criticizes Woman)
Submitted BY: crazy_woo

Marriage and Tornado

Q: What do marriage and a tornado have in common?
A: Well you start off with a lot of blowing and then sucking, and then next thing you know your house is gone!

Categories: Relationship Jokes (Marriage Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Man Criticizes Woman) , Word Play Jokes , Riddles
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous