Like a Million Bucks

You have a face like a million dollars... All green and wrinkled!

Sleeping Blonde

Q: Why was the blonde having trouble sleeping?
A: She forgot to close her eyes.

A Work of Art

A tiny but dignified old lady was among a group looking at an art exhibition in a newly opened gallery. Suddenly one contemporary painting caught her eye."What on earth," she inquired of the artist standing nearby, "is that?" He smiled condescendingly. "That, my dear lady, is supposed to be a mother and her child." "Well, then," snapped the little old lady, "why isn't it?"