Q: Why did they let the turkey join the band?
A: Because he had his own drumsticks!
End of the Line
Q: What always comes at the end of Thanksgiving?
A: The letter "g"
What to Wear
Q: What should you wear to Thanksgiving dinner?
A: A har-vest!
You'll be so fat after Thanksgiving the only thing stopping you from going to the gym is the doorframe.
Little Johnny at Thanksgiving
One day, Little Johnny overheard his parents fighting. Later, he asked what "bitch" and "bastard" mean. They explained that they mean "lady" and "gentleman." The next day, he overheard his parents having sex. He later asked what "penis" and "vagina" mean. His parents explained that they refer to "hats" and "coats." At supper the next day, Little Johnny's mom cut her finger in the kitchen and yelled, "Oh f**k!" Little Johnny asked what that meant, and she said it means "cut." A week later, guests arrive for Thanksgiving dinner. Little Johnny welcomes them at the door, saying, "Hello bitches and bastards! Hurry up with your penises and vaginas -- we can't wait to f**k the turkey!"