Four For One

Q: How can you get four suits for a dollar?
A: Buy a deck of cards.

Premium Poop

I had to pay $150 for the bowel prep medication before my colonoscopy.
That shit was expensive.

Medical Miracles

There's more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040 there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs, huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.