A Prostitute Goes To The Hospital...

A prostitute goes to the hospital to visit a colleague who is about to have a heart transplant. She's worried about the friend so she says to the doctor "I'm worried about my friend doc, what if her body rejects the organ?" The doctor responds "Well she's 36 years old and healthy. How long has she been in business?" She answers "she's been working since she was 19 years old but what does that have to do with anything?" He tells her "Well she's been working 17 years and hasn't rejected an organ yet!"

DAM Stands For...

Q: What does D.A.M stand for?
A: Mothers Against Dyslexia.

Everything We Need

A young teacher was trying to teach her six-year-old's about sharing. In the midst of doing so, she said that no one had everything they wanted. At this point, a young arm was energetically pumping at the back of the class. She tried to ignore him, but little Johnny started saying, "oh miss, oh miss!" with his arm pumping. "Yes, Johnny, what is it?" she asked, trying to remain calm. Little Johnny stood up and proclaimed to the class, "at our house, we have everything." "Don't be silly," the teacher replied, "not even the richest man has everything." "We do," he answered, "My daddy said so the other day." "Now, why would your father say such a thing?" she asked. "Well, my fifteen year old sister came home with her skinhead boyfriend, and told poppa she was pregnant. That's when my dad said "God, that's all we needed."