We're sorry, but it appears that you are using an anonymous proxy. To prevent fraudulent voting, we don't allow votes from anonymous proxies.

This contest requires users to be registered in order to vote.

You must be a registered user to submit a joke.  But registering is FREE and don’t worry, we only need a name and e-mail address, and we don’t sell or share your information with any third-parties (see Privacy Policy).

You must complete account validation before submitting jokes. Click here to go to your profile page to complete the process.

We’re sorry, but your browser settings indicate that you don’t want to be tracked.  You can either disable that setting or simply register for a FREE account, so we’ll know that you want us to track your preferences and feedback.  Don’t worry, we only need a name and e-mail address and we don’t sell or share your information with any third-parties (see Privacy Policy).


The best jokes and joke writers!

Only A Head

Nine months to the day following their wedding, the Coopers had a baby. Unfortunately, it was born without arms or legs, without even a torso. It was just a head. Still, the Coopers loved and cared for their child, spoiling and indulging it. Finally after twenty years, they took a much-needed vacation and whom should they meet on the cruise ship but a European doctor who had recently achieved a medical breakthrough. "I know," he said, "how to attach arms and legs to your child, how to make him whole." The Coopers cut their trip short, rushed home and into the room where the head lay in its crib, and said,
"Honey... Mom and Dad have the most wonderful surprise for you!"
''Noooooo!," shrieked the head, "Not another hat!"

Hellen Keller's Favorite Color

Q: What was Helen Keller's favorite color?

A: Velcro.

Doctor Visit

A biker goes to the doctor with hearing problems. The Doctor says, "Can you describe the symptoms to me?" The biker replies, "Yes, Homer is a fat yellow lazy bastard and Marge is a skinny bird with big blue hair!"

Wonder Car

Q: Where does Stevie Wonder park his car?

A: In blind spots.

Favorite Insults

When you're at a loss for words but want to tell someone that he or she is stupid, remember these quips from our collection at JokerZ - enjoy!

  • Operating in stand-by mode.
  • Ought to have a warning label on his forehead.
  • Out there where the buses don't run.
  • Outlet isn't grounded.
  • Over the rainbow.
  • Overdue for reincarnation.
  • Paged/swapped out.
  • Paralyzed from the neck up.
  • Parents beat him with an ugly stick.
  • Parked his head and forgot where he left it.
  • Pedaling real fast, but not getting anywhere.
  • People around her are at risk of second hand idiocy.
  • Perfect chassis, bad driver.
  • Perfect face for Halloween.