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The best jokes and joke writers!

Synchronized Swimming

If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too?

Like Mother Like Daughter

A man takes his 10 year old daughter to the doctor. He says "Doctor, I want to put her on the pill." The Doctor says "Why?!? Is she sexually active?" The guy says "Nah, she just lies there like her mother."

Keep Eating

Mommy mommy I hate daddy's guts.

Shut up kid and keep eating.

Daddy, When Will I Get One?

A little girl goes into the toilet and sees her dad having a shower. It's at that moment she spots his penis. Pointing at it she says..... "Daddy, daddy, when will I get one of those?" The dad looks at the little girl, looks out the door, looks back at the little girl and winks.... "When your mommy goes to the mall!"

Jewish Pedophile

Q: What did the Jewish pedophile say to the little boy after luring him into his car?

A: Hey, go easy on those fucking sweets.