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The best jokes and joke writers!

No One Understands

The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.

Heavy Metal Guitarist

Q: How do you get a heavy metal guitarist to stop playing guitar?

A: Put sheet music in front of him.

Musical Operation

A man with a broken hand says to doctor, "Will I be able to play guitar after the operation on my hand?" The doctor says, "Yes of course." "That's great! I never could before."

Country Tunes

  • Drop Kick Me, Jesus, Through The Goalposts Of Life
  • Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I'm Kissing You Goodbye
  • Her Teeth Were Stained, But Her Heart Was Pure
  • How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away?
  • I Changed Her Oil, She Changed My Life!
  • Don't Know Whether To Kill Myself Or Go Bowling!
  • Flushed You From The Toilets Of My Heart.
  • I Keep Forgettin' I Forgot About You
  • I'm Just A Bug On The Windshield Of Life
  • I've Been Flushed From The Bathroom Of Your Heart
  • If Love Were Oil, I'd Be A Quart Low
  • My John Deere Was Breaking Your Field, While Your Dear John Was Breaking My Heart
  • Oh, I've Got Hair Oil On My Ears And My Glasses Are Slipping Down, But Baby I Can See Through You
  • She Made Toothpicks Out Of The Timber Of My Heart

Dead Head

Went to a Grateful Dead concert last night.  They played for 18 hours straight. 

It was a good song.