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The best jokes and joke writers!

Yo Mama - Sandbox

Yo mama so ugly, when she was a kid, cats tried to bury her in the sandbox.

Boo!

If I was as ugly as you were, I wouldn't say "Hi" to people. I'd say "BOO!"

The Mirror

While walking the red carpet, a celebrity turned to the paparazzi standing nearby. "This," she said, "I suppose, is one of those hideous representations you call modern art?" "No, madam," replied the paparazzi. "That one's called a mirror."

Yo Mama - Reflection

Yo mama is so ugly, when she looks in the mirror, her reflection ducks.

Finding the Right Girl to Marry

An extraordinarily handsome man decided he had the God-given responsibility to marry the perfect woman so they could produce children beyond comparison. With that as his mission he began searching for the perfect woman. After a diligent, but fruitless, search up and down the east coast, he started to head west. Shortly thereafter he met a farmer who had three stunning, gorgeous daughters that positively took his breath away. So he explained his mission to the farmer, asking for permission to marry one of them. The farmer simply replied, "They're all lookin' to get married, so you came to the right place. Look them over and select the one you want. "The man dated the first daughter. The next day the farmer asked for the man's opinion. "Well" said the man, " She's just a weeeeee bit, not that you can hardly notice, but pigeon-toed. "The farmer nodded and suggested the man date one of the other girls; so the man went out with the second daughter. The next day, the farmer again asked how things went. "Well," the man replied, "She's just a weeeee bit, not that you can hardly tell, cross-eyed. "The farmer nodded and suggested he date the third girl to see if things might be better. So he did. The next morning the man rushed in exclaiming, "She's perfect, just perfect! She's the one I want to marry!" So they were wed right away. Months later the baby was born. When the man visited nursery he was horrified, the baby was the ugliest, most pathetic human you can imagine. He rushed to his father-in-law asking how such a thing could happen considering the parents. "Well," explained the farmer, "She was just a weeeee bit, not that you could hardly tell, pregnant when you met her."