Boy Born With a Head

A boy is born without a body, only a head. For his 18th birthday his father, takes him to a bar for a drink. The father orders his son a scotch and when the boy drinks it, an arm pops out of his head. He drinks another shot and another arm pops out. After the next shot a torso pops out. After more shots, suddenly, he has a whole body. The boy runs out of the bar and gets hit by a truck, killing him instantly. A drunkard in the corner looks at the father and says, "He should have quit while he was a head."

Yo Momma - Ran Away

Yo mama's so fat, when she ran away, they had to use all four sides of the milk carton.

Motorist Stopped By Police

Q: A policeman stops a motorist and asks, "Excuse me, sir, have you been drinking?"
A: The motorist says, "Why -- do I got an ugly girl next to me?"