Wall Fish

Q: What did the fish say when he ran into a wall?
A: Dam.

Bar Ghost Encounter

Two drunk guys stumble out of a bar and get into their car. After they've been driving for a while, they see a ghostly face appear at the window. "It's a ghost, dude!" "Roll down the window, ask him what he wants!" The driver rolls down the window, and asks the ghost. "You got a smoke?" They give him a smoke, and the face goes away. A few minutes later, the face returns. "You got a light?" They give a light, and the face goes away. A few minutes later, the face returns. "You guys need help getting out the mud?"

On the House

Q: Can you get free drinks by sleeping with the bartender?
A: It's worth a shot.