Avocado

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Avocado!
Avocado who?
Avocado a cold!

Mexican Octopus

Q: What do you call a Mexican crossed with an octopus?
A: I don’t know, but you should see it pick lettuce!

Tortoise Costume

A man goes to a costume party with a woman draped over his shoulders and says he’s come as a tortoise. “Who’s that on your back?” asks the host. “That?” he says, “That’s Michelle.”