Sex Jokes

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Pay Me

Q: What are porn stars paid?
A: Income

Categories: Riddles , Sex Jokes (Oral Sex Jokes)
Anonymous

Threats Used in Dysfunctional Families

"Finish your lima beans or you're not getting any heroin for dessert!"
"If you don't stop that this instant, I'll have Grandma perform another striptease for you."
"If this plexiglass wasn't between us, I'd wash your mouth out with soap, young man."
"Do you want me to put a tofu burrito in your pants? Well? Do You?!"
"Billy Bob, you finish them chores or Sis ain't goin' to the prom with ya!"
"Eat your brussel sprouts, or Mommy won't love you anymore."
"Lyle, Erik -- either behave, or go to your suites!"
"If you don't eat your peas, Chelsea, I'll make you stay at the Gingrich's house!"
"Don't make me put you back in the womb!"
"As long as you live under this roof, you're *going* to wear that dress, young man!"
"You just wait til your father gets paroled!"
"Stop crying, Lourdes, or Uncle Dennis will kick you in the groin."
"Young lady, don't make me send you to the Citadel!"
and the Number 1 Threat Used in Dysfunctional Families... "All right, Little Mister, no more time in the sheep pen for you!"

Categories: Dark Humor Jokes (Pedophile Jokes) , Sex Jokes (Bestiality Jokes) , Sexist Jokes (Men vs Women Jokes) , Animal Jokes (Sheep Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Altar Boys in the Snow

Three altar boys are standing in the snow with their pants down around their ankles. They have their penises in a snow bank.
Sister Margaret sticks her head out the window and says, "Boys! Boys! Whatever are you doing, you're going to catch pneumonia. Put your penises away."
The tallest altar boy turns around and yells, "Sister Margaret, don't worry, we know what we're doing. Father Porter always likes a couple of cold ones after work!"

Categories: Religion Jokes (Nun / Priest Jokes) , Sex Jokes (Private Parts)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous